Dear Allyson
It’s been nine months since you’ve been gone. Crazy. Not a day goes by that I don’t think about you.
The boys are doing fine. Jack has a female friend that stayed with us this summer and even visited your parents in NJ. Maybe there is potential to be more than friends? Alex is working as a camp counselor and getting ready for UW. He spends his free time hanging out with friends before they go separate ways to college.
Nicky and Berry (our dogs) are also doing fine. After a frightening hospitalization with pulmonary hypertension, Berry is doing well on meds and sassier than ever. The dogs are spending the warm summer days hanging out in the pen and greeting visitors from the local Facebook gifting group.
I’m in the process of downsizing the house in preparation to move to Taiwan. Remember when Jack was apartment hunting, we found an apartment complex near his school with furnished 4 bedroom apartments? I like that place. Since they offer underground parking, I’ve decided to take the Mercedes with me. Whenever I drive the SL55 around Taiwan, I can imagine you sitting next to me soaking in the new world with wonder.
I found your old picture box and the film scanner you bought. Maybe you purposely left them for me as a project. When I scanned those old photos and think back about us, I can’t but marvel at our time together.
Prior to meeting me, you were a model, a homecoming queen (runner up), a beach lifeguard, a ski instructor, and an Olympic snowboarder. You were as American as apple pie. And yet, when you met me, you changed your whole life, for me. Yeah, me, a pretty average dude. Till this day I am in awe that you chose me to be your man.
You followed me to Seattle, which couldn’t be further away from your family and friends. After we married, within a week of returning home from our honeymoon, you changed to my family name. You were doggedly determined about becoming Allyson Wen. Not every bride changes their name. It means a lot to me that you did. It symbolizes that you have fully embraced my world, and the transformation of yours.
Not only did you simply adopt my family name, you adopted my culture. You learned how to make the best Taiwanese Popcorn Chicken and Beef Noodle Soup. I find it hilarious and heartwarming that in our household, you make the Chinese food and I cook the American meats. Who would have thunk that!?
Over the years, you’ve been to Taiwan many times and grew to love it. You have your favorite restaurants and neighborhoods. You travelled around Taipei and the rest of the island like a local. In the last few years, you’ve probably spent more time there than me!
My only regret is that we won’t be able to spend time there together. Moving to Taiwan was my gift of love to you. A chance for us to renew our life together. Just the two of us, like the old days, but this time with a few more wrinkles and gray hairs.
When I see you in our wedding photos, I can only imagine how excited and happy you were to finally become Mrs. Allyson Wen. You weren’t afraid to leave your family home because you knew that with me, you would create your own. You are my life’s blessing.
Our anniversary is coming up. I don’t know what to expect. Outwardly, I think it will be just another day for me. A day to help Alex get ready for college.
Deep down inside, I miss you tremendously. Life isn’t the same without you. When you passed away, part of me died with you. Wil and Allyson is no longer. I am now just me, just Wil.
Although I am living in solitude, I know you want me to live well. I will wake up each day, try to do something meaningful, and do something that keeps your memory alive.
I will do that every day until it’s my time to see you on the other side.
Forever yours,
Wil